Woody Allen (real name – Allan Stewart Konigsberg) is an actor, director, screenwriter, comedian, musician and playwright whose career spans more than 50 years. He began his career in the entertainment industry in the 1950’s as a comedy writer for TV.
In the early 1960’s, Allen began performing as a stand-up comic, emphasizing monologues rather than traditional jokes.
Many of the classic Woody Allen quotes we have chosen come from those times.
His entry into the movie business started a few years later, since which time he has written and directed some 40 films, also appearing in many of them.
Woody Allen has been nominated 24 times and won four Academy Awards. He has more screenwriting Academy Award nominations than any other writer.
And, just for relaxation, he performs regularly as a jazz clarinetist at small venues in Manhattan.
For your relaxation, enjoy the classic quotes of Woody Allen we have selected:
1. I am not afraid of death, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.
2. Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
3. I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it’s the government.
4. Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon.
5. You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
6. Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, ‘Be fruitful and multiply,’ but not in those words.
7. To you I’m an atheist; to God, I’m the Loyal Opposition.
8. Marriage is the death of hope.
9. Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.
10. Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
11. Most of the time I don’t have much fun. The rest of the time I don’t have any fun at all.
12. Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
13. The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
14. Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.
Do you have a favorite Woody Allen quote?
It is said that people either love him, or loathe him. How do you feel?
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