15 Ace Ventura Quotes To Make You Collapse With Laughter

Ace Ventura is a fictional character, played by Jim Carrey.

He appeared in two films, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, released in 1994, and Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls, released in 1995.

Ventura is a ‘pet detective’ who gave up his job as a police officer because he was driven by an insatiable adoration of animals, and a desire to protect them from human mistreatment. Like most other fictional detectives, he has extraordinary powers of observation and deduction.

On the other hand, Ventura as depicted by Carrey, is both persistently crude and exceptional flamboyant – an ideal role for him! The films are full of one-liners, and it looks as if not all the exchanges between the characters were fully scripted, with Carrey appearing to ad-lib on occasion.

Our LifeDaily team has chosen these Ace Ventura Quotes to give an essence of the character as interpreted by Jim Carrey.

To help you better understand the context of the dialogue, these are the roles:
Ace Ventura – Pet detective
Melissa Robinson – Chief Publicist, Miami Dolphins
Lt. Lois Einhorn – Police Officer

1. Ace Ventura: If I’m not back in five minutes… just wait longer.
2. Melissa: Hi, I’m Melissa Robinson.
   Ace Ventura: Pleasure to meet you.
   Melissa: Did you have any trouble getting in?
   Ace Ventura: No, the guy with the rubber glove was surprisingly gentle.
3. Melissa: You know, you’re just mad because your stupid little pebble theory didn’t work out and you don’t know how to express your anger.
   Ace Ventura: Oh yeah? And you’re ugly
4. Lois Einhorn: Listen, pet dick. How would you like me to make your life a living hell?
   Ace Ventura: Well, I’m not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking. Hey, maybe I’ll give you a call sometime. Your number’s still 911? All righty then.
5. Ace Ventura: Holy testicle Tuesday.
   Lois Einhorn: What the hell is he doing here?
   Ace Ventura: I came to confess. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll.
6. Melissa: You really love animals, don’t you?
   Ace Ventura: If it gets cold enough.
7. Lois Einhorn: Ventura, when I get out of that bathroom, you better be gone.
   Ace Ventura: Is it number one or number two? I just want to know how much time I have.
8. Lois Einhorn: What would you know about pressure.
   Ace Ventura: Well, I have kissed a man.
9. Lois Einhorn: You’ve done some fine detective work… ‘Ace’.
   Ace Ventura: I’m sorry. Could you please speak in to my good ear? I thought I heard you call me Ace.
10. Ace Ventura: Receipts, what about receipts? There’s gotta be receipts.
11. Ace Ventura: Once you get inside my head, there’s no turning back baby.
12. Melissa: That was pretty impressive, what you did at the apartment.
    Ace Ventura: You don’t have to tell me. I was there.
13. Sexy Woman: [after Ace has returned her dog] Thank you Mr. Ventura. Is there any way I can repay you?
    Ace Ventura: Well, a reward would be nice. I sustained some damage to my vehicle. Had to fill it with premium.
    Sexy Woman: Wouldn’t you like me to take your pants off instead?
    Ace Ventura: [Pretends as if it’s a tough choice] Gee, let me think. Um, sure!
14. Ace Ventura: Good night, everybody. You’ve been a wonderful audience, I’ll be here all week. Be sure to tip your waitress.
15. Ace Ventura: Your request is not unlike your lower intestine, stinky and loaded with danger.

We think these Ace Ventura Quotes convey the spirit of the movies, which we warned could be a little vulgar.

Have you seen these films? What did you think of them, and Jim Carrey’s humor?

You can share your opinions by making use of the comments feed below.